Lonely 2

Lonely is not alone

Lonely is not being thrown

Lonely is not sobbing

Lonely is not flogging

Neither is it sorry state

Nor is it ill fate

It is a feeling, an emotion.

It is a strong notion

To look within,

Beyond your bone and skin

It makes you know,

What you never show.

The bottled up thoughts

Experience from the stumbled walks;

The talks you have with yourself,

About the devil and the elf.

The silence on the outside,

The roaring noise inside.

That confused vibe,

The belonging to a different tribe.

Crying without tears,

Dreading internal fears.

Seeing darkness in a room of neon lights,

Standing on ground, still fearing heights.

You know no one will miss your absence,

Unnoticed is your presence.

Lonely

Lonely eyes,

watch the boundless skies;

caught in ties,

of the worldly lies.

Lonely feet,

can no destination meet;

their walk on the grass,

feels like walking on sharp glass.

The dancing daisies,

the happy babies,

the pouring rains,

none can wash away the stains;

given by those I thought loved me,

there was a blur that didn't let me see

blur of disgust and anger,

to them I was just a stranger

It’s the pain that hurts,

beyond the string of words,

the building fear,

is difficult to bear.

Can’t feel my breath,

better shall be death,

for I feel so stuffy,

hate my eyes so puffy.

Confused is my being,

with no route of fleeing,

can sense the building hatred,

I am getting betrayed,

by hopes of happiness,

and by the gifted emptiness.

All I wish is to sleep,

and take another leap,

of freedom from this room,

and get past this life of doom.

To Baujee, with Love....

Time of sadness, time of grief.

Life would take such a turn, is beyond belief.

You were a mentor, you were a guide,

By your instruction, we would always abide.

You taught us values, in us you imbibed discipline.

To Drona, you were akin.

Miss the days when holding your strong hand,

We would go to the beach and play in the sand.

Miss the days when with our assignments you helped us,

Your eyes were never tired waiting for us to board the school bus.

Then, time became the ugly foe,

Stole you from head to toe.

You started turning frail,

End approached the fairy tale.

Your pills increased, will still strong,

Yours was a strong persona amid the throng.

Your strength of body and mind,

Was well, one of a kind.

By your captivating ghazals and poems’ sound,

Our mind, body and souls are still bound.

We miss you badly every day,

Wish with you forever we could stay.

We would eat jalebies with milk on days some,

Pani Pooris and kachories you always found awesome.

Every day we talk to your picture,

But, we miss you in structure.

Please come back with the same gait,

Hope time could erase that dark date,

When calm and still you laid,

For your soul, we all prayed.

Baujee! You were a jolly good being,

Missing you is a horrible feeling.

Only from body the king has gone,

A genius like you will never be born.

Birthday Wishlist

Another year passes by,
another leap higher I wish I could fly;
I wonder what I gained,
How any hearts I bloomed, how many I stained.

I went through happiness and grief,
I lost people and relations beyond my belief;
I wish I smiled more,
I wish I was content to the core.
I still wish I danced like I was four,
Wish I could drink with my girls by the shore.

Some time back on day this,
I would flutter in my birthday bliss.
Would demand gifts from my daddy dear,
my list had goodies like the huge teddy bear.

I would remind the world to wish me on time,
missing my birthday was a dangerous crime.
A dress new, shoes and bag would make me complete,
dinner with family would be the best treat.

Wine and chocolates, cakes and a dress,
my wishlist was endless.
Now I wonder what is wanted by me,
my wishes are locked in a box without key.

My wants can no longer be bought by paper,
these are the wishes, money can't cater.

A mug of black coffee in solitude,
my lost persona and attitude.
A glass of wine and favorite show on TV,
with my sister, chattering with giggles and glee.
A long walk on the beach,
to get lost from the world's reach.

This is all I wish on this day,
like a daisy in the winds I sway.
Contentment find me and forever stay.
Santa! are you listening to what I say?
Your Christmas child is hanging her socks by the sill,
for you to come and her wishlist fill.

Please spur the magic fast,
and my wish be granted and happiness forever last.

Modest Jealousy

Jealous of the rain,

For so easily it dances time and again;

Jealous of the sparrows flying,

For theirs is a freedom flight above the sky eyeing.

Jealous of the fishes in waters deep,

Cause no one can hover around them even while asleep.

Jealous of the trees that sway in the wind,

They feel freshness and changes unlike the limbed.

Jealous of the coffee beans that are ground,

Since for spreading aroma they are crowned.

Jealous of the waves of the endless seas,

For the liberty they have to voice thoughts with ease.

Wonder why I aren’t any of these,

Why do I strive to others’ please?

Wish I was one of the above,

Would have been able to gain and spread love…..

New Breath

You are hidden from the world,

Within me you lie curled.

They think you breathe from me,

They know not that my breath is because of thee.

You move, you clap, you call me out,

I love your silent talks that are louder than worldly shout.

Every moment is special between us,

No worldly tension, chaos or fuss.

We talk, eat and drink,

We share jokes away from everyone's blink.

Elated am I keeping you secret and special,

This bond is way beyond the superficial.

Love is too small a word to describe what we share,

The only relation filled with emotions and care.

Waited have I to feel you arrive,

People felt I was immature and naive.

Now I have a new life after decades three,

Now I feel light and free.

They wonder if you are a boy or girl,

For me you are a happy swirl;

Who will spread love and joy,

Does it matter if you are a girl or boy.

You have turned a couple into a family happy,

Papa is awaiting to change your nappy.

When all sleep at night,

We relish chocolates in a room without light.

Thank God for this Happy plight.

They say that life's this is the phase best,

For me this is a new life of happiness and fest.

Thank you for completing all,

Your presence is a magical ball.

Now I know why your granny loves me so much,

Best thing for a mother is feeling her child's touch

Us

I looked for you everywhere,
in sunshine, in dark;
in the dusty storms, in the clouds' spark.
I saw you through the moonlight,
when through the breeze you hugged me tight.

But that wasnt enough, for I wanted you here,
I wanted to hold you without any fear.
It's been ages since I was yearning for you,
I know you were feeling the same too.

Then, when my happiness was at stake,
when I thought I was living in a dream fake,
You walked in to my life with strides long,
and I knew to you I belong.

It was not your eyes, it was not your lips;
but my heart still had a million skips.
It's your morning call that are better than dreams all.
It's your funny streak that lifts my mood bleak.

It's the way we fight,
it's the way we hold our hands tight;
that makes me feel you are real and forever,
and till eternity we are together.

There may be times when talk we may not,
when we may be angry we may have fought;
But we know what lies beneath is a bond strong,
and will make worthwhile our walk long.

It's the way you make me smile,
it's your walking style,
it's the way you are oh so unromantic,
it's the fact that you are pragmatic,
that makes me fall for you,
my deam has finally come true.

All romantic songs make me blush,
When I am with you time seems to rush.

Thinking of you makes me smile,
With you I can walk that extra mile.
To describe you, fall short of words I,
All I know is you are there when I want to laugh and cry.

I can't describe all this,
For now, I want to enjoy this heavenly bliss......